“Lay” and “Lie” Are NOT the Same Word (So What’s the Difference?)

If you ever feel the need to short-circuit a grammarian, just ask them to explain the difference between lay and lie. The technical difference between these two words is simple enough; however, once we get into the weeds about what the difference actually means and—heaven forbid—start talking about the various tenses of each word, your eyes might just start to cross.

I’m going to stick to the basics here and try to explain this grammatical catastrophe in the simplest way possible in order to minimize the amount of eye-crossing!

What’s the Difference Between Lay and Lie?

The most basic way to describe the difference between lay and lie is this:

Lay is a transitive verb meaning to put or set down.

Lie is an intransitive verb meaning to be or to stay at rest in a horizontal position; to recline.

I found a handy trick in The Copyeditor’s Handbook that can help you keep the two straight: “A useful mnemonic is to hear the long “a” sound in lay and place and the long “i” sound in lie and recline.”

Lay and place are often synonyms, as are lie and recline.

But what’s all this about transitive and intransitive verbs?

Transitive vs. Intransitive Verbs

A transitive verb has a direct object. An intransitive verb does NOT have a direct object.

A direct object is simply a thing that receives the action of a verb. If the verb is acting on an object, it’s a transitive verb.

I threw the ball.

In this example, the subject is “I,” the verb is “threw,” and the direct object is “the ball.” “The ball” is the object that received the action of the verb.

Mark picked up his fork.

The subject is “Mark,” the verb is “picked up,” and the direct object is “his fork.” “His fork” is the object that received the action of the verb “picked up.”

Intransitive verbs do not have a direct object.

Shelby ran.

The subject is “Shelby,” and the verb is “ran.” “Ran” does not have a direct object—it’s not acting on anything. Therefore, “ran” is an intransitive verb.

When my uncle told the joke, Jasmine couldn’t stop laughing.

In the first part of this sentence, the verb “told” takes the direct object “the joke”; therefore, “told” is a transitive verb. In the second part of this sentence, the verb “couldn’t stop laughing” does not have an object; therefore, it’s an intransitive verb.

Applying It to Lay and Lie

As a reminder, lay is a transitive verb (meaning it must take an object), and lie is an intransitive verb (meaning it cannot take an object).

If you’re using lay, make sure there’s an object that it’s acting on.

Please lay your briefcase on the ground so we can begin our meeting.

Lay takes the object “your briefcase.”

Perhaps you should lie down for a while.

Lie does not have an object.

INCORRECT: I’m going to lie the dessert on the counter if that’s OK!

There is a direct object here: “the dessert.” Lie is an intransitive verb and cannot take the direct object, so we need lay instead.

CORRECT: I’m going to lay the dessert on the counter if that’s OK!

INCORRECT: Martha said she would lay down for a nap about an hour ago.

There is no direct object here; therefore, the transitive verb lay is incorrect. Instead, we need the intransitive lie.

CORRECT: Martha said she would lie down for a nap about an hour ago.

Starting to get the hang of it?

Now that we’ve established that lay and lie are different words, we need to talk about their various tenses. But I have to warn you: this is where things get really tricky. 😬

Here’s the Trouble…

Here’s a chart showing the different tenses of lay and lie:

Let’s go through a few examples to show the differences.

• Lay present tense: Please lay the book on the table.
• Lay past tense: He laid the book on the table.
• Lay past participle: I had laid the book on the table.
• Lay present participle: She is laying the book on the table.

• Lie present tense: He might lie down for a nap.
• Lie past tense: She lay down for a nap a while ago.
• Lie past participle: After I had lain down for a nap…
• Lie present participle: I am lying down for a nap now.

Although some of the tenses are irregular, they’re not super tricky . . . except for ONE. Did you spot the problem?

The past tense of lie is lay. That should be illegal.

This is likely where most of the trouble comes from with lay vs. lie. What kind of word takes another existing word as its own past tense?!

Lay present tense: Just lay the flowers on the counter, please.

Lie past tense: Yesterday, my dog lay on the carpet in a sunny spot.

…Rude.

Another potentially tricky one is lain, the past participle of lie. Lain is just not a commonly used word, so it might feel awkward to say. However, it is the correct form for the past participle.

Lie past participle: I had lain in bed for hours before finally falling asleep.

The different forms of lay are easier, particularly since they all sound similar: lay, laid, and laying.

Are They Really That Different?

Even though the differences may seem small, the distinction between lay and lie is an important one. In educated (and especially formal) usage, you should be careful to use the correct word. Once you’re able to confidently tell the difference between a transitive and intransitive verb, it’s really only a matter of remembering those irregular tenses for lie.

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary of English Usage states, “Many people use lay for lie, but certain others will judge you uncultured if you do. Decide for yourself what is best for you.”

What questions do you have about lay and lie? Let me know in the comments!

Click here to learn the difference between who and whom!

Sources:

• “America’s Most Trusted Dictionary.” Merriam-Webster. Accessed August 7, 2024. https://www.merriam-webster.com/.
• Ebbitt, D. R., and W. R. Ebbitt. Index to English. 8th ed. New York: Oxford University Press, 1990.
• Einsohn, Amy. The Copyeditor’s Handbook. 3rd ed. Berkeley and Los Angeles, California: Univ of California Pr, 2011.
• Merriam-Webster. Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary of English Usage. 14th ed. Taunton, MA: QuadGraphics, 2016.